.recoup.

when you come back from camp, all things are kinda out of whack. i'm still looking at the date as if it isn't real. a lot just doesn't seem real when you're in a place that focuses on the happiness of a child. i know i have to unpack the car, start doing laundry, get to finishing my online course and gear up for my last week of work, but i just can't do it yet. i could've stayed it out with the CF crew just a bit longer, but after we all got together at the bar, i just wanted to sleep in my own bed, but that came with its own consequences, which would be me waking up at 11pm to an empty house. it's a shock after spending 8 days in a cabin with 17 other girls. and i love solitude, but my heart feels so lonely right now. it's so freakin quiet it hurts.

camp was amazing. just when you start to get too tired, you have someone remind you why you are there. this is the one week of the year that this child is the center of the universe in a world that would normally reject him or her. this camp puts the emphasis on being truly special and important in our eyes. these kids are simply amazing and really do teach us how to be better people, to be tolerant, patient, loving, gracious, humble and less self-centered. it's difficult to care only about yourself when you realize how much people around you need your attention and help. truly amazing. and the amount of affirmation i received from my peers was overwhelming. i wish i could pack up these people and bring them with me to florida, because it wouldn't make it as scary. but we'll see each other again. i pray and hope i do, because it is so essential to my life more than ever.